Write in the Middle of It All

The first day back after break. Whew! It was nice to get back at it, but I wasn't quite ready for the day. I let myself fall into my preferred sleeping pattern over the break - up until 1:00 in the morning and sleeping until 8:00 or so each morning. While away from work, this was fabulous! Unfortunately, I slept until 9:00 Sunday morning, instead of getting back on a regular work week schedule. So it was no surprise that I couldn't get to sleep last night. I think it was around midnight before I finally fell asleep. That would have been fine if I hadn't planned to go in early this morning. I was rethinking that decision when the alarm went off at 4:45. Tonight I'm heading to bed at 8:30. My pajamas are already calling me!! Worn out, weary, zonked...today's word is tired.

My soon to be 24 year old daughter came into my bedroom a few minutes ago. I thought she had gone to bed over an hour ago. She is a first year teacher and living with us while she pays off student loans. As an early riser, she often goes to bed around 9:00. I could tell from the way she was smiling that something was on her mind. She started to walk away, and then abruptly turned back to me. When I asked her what was wrong, she tried to say nothing. Then her eyes welled up. I scooted over in bed, flung the covers over, and talked her into getting in. She made a half-hearted attempt at saying nothing was wrong, but finally got to the point. A few minutes earlier she asked her dad a question, and he didn't give her the response she was looking for. She wanted to know if he ever felt like he had achieved the goal he set for himself, and now had nothing to look forward to. I love my husband, but deep conversations about your feelings are not in his wheelhouse. She and I had a nic

I love the water. By water, I mean the ocean. I was born in Corpus Christi, and I think the call of the sea is in my blood. Every so often, I feel pulled to make a trip to the coast. So on our honeymoon, we went to San Francisco. It was amazing!  I can still see the beautiful, blue water in my mind. We didn't stay in a hotel on the water, but we managed to spend most of our time at the waterfront. After our honeymoon, we decided to forego anniversary gifts to each other in order to save up and go on trips every five years. Our fifth anniversary, I was pregnant with our third child, so we didn't travel far - Fort Worth! But all of the other trips - our 10th, 15th, 20th, and 25th - have been to cities on the water.  We went back to San Francisco for our tenth anniversary. We loved it so much on our honeymoon, and there were many places we wanted to see that we didn't get to the first time around. After all, it was our honeymoon! Our other trips have been to Niagara Fa

Today felt like a Saturday. My husband Kenneth took the day off, and we spent the majority of it doing the little errands and tasks we usually do on Saturdays. We accomplished a lot and got a jump on our real Saturday. We spent the morning removing the leaves from the front yard. We have two live oak trees in our yard, so we get to bag leaves from our neighbor's trees in the fall and our trees in the spring. We're just lucky like that! This afternoon I met a girlfriend for a much needed pedicure. I had to hold in my sighs and moans through the hot rock massage. I didn't think anything could ever feel better than that, until she began to massage my feet. Sometimes if feels like the pedicurist is trying to rub a hole in my foot, but today's massage was Goldilocks-like - not too hard, not too soft. I was in the chair for over an hour and left feeling so relaxed. Now I'm watching one of my favorite old shows - Divine Design. I love seeing what Candice Olson will d

Today's the first day that I have sat down to write without an idea already brewing. So here are some random thoughts... Seems to me if we want students to believe that we consider them the future of our country, then maybe we should listen to what would make them feel safe at school.  I get the whole right to bear arms - just not sure I can connect that to the right to bear automatic weapons.  I love to watch mindless television shows like Survivor. I know they have no redeeming value, but I like them because I don't have to think. My favorite hobby is reading. When I'm really into a book, I'm torn between wanting to see how it turns out and not wanting the book to end. As soon as I finish a book, I usually buy a new one. I am enjoying writing in this blog more than I ever thought I would.  Without definite aim, reason, or pattern...today's word is random.

Today is smack in the middle of my spring break. Four days behind me, and four days ahead.  I gave in to the pushy voice that's been telling me I have too much work to do to really enjoy the week and went into the office for a few hours today. I was able to strike a few things off the To Do list, and let's be honest, who doesn't love that?  I'm a little irritated at myself, though, for listening to that pushy voice. I work too hard already, and if Pushy Voice had her way, that's all I would ever do. I have turned her off for the evening and am enjoying a documentary about Princess Diana.  Tomorrow I will spend part of the day with some girlfriends being pampered with pedicures. Nothing rejuvenates like a massage with hot rocks. Oh, I can feel it already! I still have some work I'd like to finish before I head back to school next week. But I'm not going to let it take over my break.  Stability, equilibrium, footing...today's word is balance.

I started today in the middle of last night - I picked my daughter and her college friend up from the airport at midnight. It was nearly 1:00 this morning before we pulled into the driveway. As tired as I was driving to the airport, I loved the shift in my schedule. During the work week, I am an early riser. Not because I love to get up early - it's more about the quiet hour or two of work with no one around to interrupt.  But my true nature is a night owl. I love staying up late working on projects, reading, or watching old movies. I feel like I get the best sleep from 2:00 am to 9:00 am. I tend to wake up naturally and feel so rested. Every time we have a week or more off from school I fall back into this pattern - it's who I am. What a blessing it is to have these days to rest and just be me.  Tranquil, soothing, peaceful...today's word is restful.

She's older than I am by a year and a few months, but you'd think we were twins by the way our brains think alike. No matter how long it's been since we've seen each other or talked to each other, we pick right back up where we left off.  Most of my favorite childhood memories are about times we got into trouble together. I don't remember all of the specifics of what we did, but I do remember the laughter. Laughing so hard I couldn't breathe. We never had to say anything - just a look could cause the stomach-seizing laughter to erupt.  Now that we're grown, we still share that unshakable bond.  We've shared all of life's roller coaster ride with each other, both the ups and the downs.  She is a constant in my life, and someone I can always count on to lift me up. I know she feels the same about me. Our mothers are sisters, so we are technically cousins. But I call her sister because that's who she is to me. Companion, friend, partner in c

What a wonderful day. I actually woke up before the alarm, and enjoyed a quiet start to the day. The parking lot was empty at the start of early worship - can't say I've ever gone to early worship the Sunday of daylight savings before! That was a first!  We went to Mockingbird Dinner for brunch following bible class. The last time we went there for brunch, we missed the time cut off - they stop brunch at 11:00. Today we made it with minutes to spare! I guess most people were still sleeping in to make up for losing the hour. Breakfast was delicious and I highly recommend the orange roll. Tonight I'm watching old movies while I try to decide what I want to do tomorrow. The possibilities are endless.  Favored, fortunate, privileged...today I am feeling blessed.

What a joy today has been! Nowhere to be, no one expecting anything from me, just a day to relax and recharge. So what did I do with such a gift? I slept in a little, because why not, right? I caught up on some shows I've had on DVR and started reading a new book. All things I love. The last few minutes I've been shopping for an ottoman - a picture that popped up on my Instagram sent me shopping on the internet. Sadly, I finally found the ottoman that was on my feed. I say sadly because it was $950! Not exactly within my budget! Ha! So maybe that's what I will do with some of my time this next week - go on an affordable ottoman hunt. I'm going to have to stay focused on the goal and not get sidetracked into buying other treasures! Free from tension and anxiety, at ease...today I feel relaxed!

This week's work is completed, and the moment has arrived.  Nine days of rest, relaxation, and rejuvenation. Whew! I have to admit I spent a little time watching the clock click slowly - will it EVER get here? The answer is Y-E-S. It's here and I plan to make the most of it. I want to read a little, shop a little, and piddle around the house a little.  One thing I've learned to do is to count the days as they are passing - this is the first day of vacation, this is the second day of vacation, etc. Otherwise, I find the days fly by, and I'm shocked there are only a couple left. Looking forward to, awaiting...I am full of anticipation.

The two curriculum directors I spend the most time with are both highly talented educators. I love the way we begin with one idea, and each add a different perspective. The final product is always better than any of us could have done alone. I love having a part in the teamwork. Our curriculum team presented our review materials to assistant principals today. Just like yesterday, they clapped as we unveiled the resources. Both times I had to hold myself back from taking a bow! Ha! Tomorrow is the beginning of a much needed break. I don't have specific plans for the days off, but that alone is a fabulous feeling! No schedule, no plans. Grateful, appreciative...today I am thankful. 

I love my job! No two days are exactly the same, and the work is challenging. Eleven years ago, I declared my intentions to work my way towards this position. A year and a half ago, I finally succeeded. I cried, no sobbed is a better word, for a full twenty minutes when I got the call. Now we are working on a restructuring that I DO believe will benefit our students. I can see the potential, and I understand the need. It doesn't make facing the end of the dream any easier to bear.  So how do you make peace with that? For me, it means setting my frame of mind before I leave the house. I believe that happiness is mostly a choice. There are countless blessings to see if I'm looking with that as a focus. There are also countless irritations and doubts if I let that be the focus.  Joy - delight, happiness, well-being. Today's word is joy. I choose joy.  

Last night after I posted my first blog, I was filled with a crazy high. I felt so accomplished! I suppose I've always wanted to be a writer - and I did it! I'm going to hold that feeling in my heart and pull it out as needed. Today my team and I made great headway with a project that initially felt difficult. Thanks to the hard work of my curriculum writer, we pushed through the confusion and created something I'm proud to present to others. I ended my day presenting the information to our specialists. I had not seen many of them since December, so their smiling faces warmed my heart. They are hard working, dedicated women who love their students. I'm proud to know them and proud to work alongside them. Proud - pleased, happy, delighted, joyful. Today I feel proud.

Life has a way of surprising us. Two months ago I would have said that was a trite saying. Now I'm living it. Not only am I venturing out into the world of writing, but I am also venturing into a new job next year. What precisely that will be remains to be seen. One thing is for certain, I will not be doing exactly the same job next year.  Just putting those words on the screen make them seem a little more real. I have to admit, I've got tears in my eyes. Wow! Didn't see that coming. Why is it we can feel so sure change is for the best, and even consider it a new opportunity, all the while grieving what will not remain constant?  As the month unfolds, I will be finishing up the year's curriculum, planning for summer school, and interviewing for a new position. Each day will have its challenges, so I'm going to be looking for a word of the day to guide my thinking. Today's word is new. New season approaching. New department structure. New opportunities. N